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I’ve had relationships with all kinds of guys, but one of the most challenging and most eye-opening was with one who had bipolar disorder.

To say that things were hard is an understatement, and while we ultimately decided to end things, I’m so glad he was part of my life because the experience taught me so much.

When Jim Mc Nulty, 58, of Burrillville, Rhode Island, got married in the 1970s, everything seemed fine at first.

"It was an absolutely normal courtship," he recalls. During his "up" or hypomanic states, he would spend huge sums of money he didn't have.

It never worked — all of these things just made him more frustrated than anything else.

The truth is, if being happy was as easy as doing those things, he wouldn’t have a mental illness.

Bipolar Disorder is one of the most severe mental disorders a person could have.

It is no one’s fault that the person has the condition.

How do these symptoms affect the loved ones of these people? Parents, siblings, friends, and co-workers see these individuals pass between depression and mania, and they see what a toll it takes on them.

One of the realities for the loved ones is they begin to understand that they cannot expect the person to always be consistent; they know the mood and behavior can significantly change.

Ending any relationship is difficult, and deciding to end a relationship because of a person’s mental condition only complicates things further. While treatments for bipolar disorder can help control the condition, it will be a constant battle throughout his or her life. Michael Brodsky, medical director of Bridges to Recovery—a crisis stabilization center with several locations in California—said while people with bipolar disorder are known to be creative, charismatic, energetic, and inspirational, they can also be unpredictable, promiscuous, inattentive, and self-focused.

Some of these qualities make it hard on a relationship, so a person must weigh whether he or she wants stability over excitement, he said. Brodsky said there’s no perfect time to end a relationship with someone who is bipolar.

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