,400-a-week summer-associate job at a prestigious Silicon Valley firm for, among other things, showing up intoxicated at the orientation meeting and complaining that he couldn’t see anything because he had lost his contacts in a hookup with a girl he had met at a party the night before; informing a female recruiter at the firm that he was “calling a porn line” when she walked into his office unexpectedly; and getting fall-down drunk at a firm retreat and shouting the F-word at a charity auction attended by the partners and their spouses.


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I know, for example, that it's important to wash produce.Telling Yourself That Kissing a Rando At The Bar Isn't Really Cheating Spoiler alert: It make take a while for karma to come full circle, but when the other shoe drops you'll learn that kissing (even when you've had a few too many or are just really, really into that Beyonce song playing during last call), is totally cheating. Putting Too Much Pressure On A Relationship Rome wasn't built in a day … Stop trying to make every guy you meet into "The One." Stop thinking about said One because chances are, there's going to be a helluva lot of them: the one that made you stronger; the one that made you more independent; the one that taught you how to do that thing with your tongue ... You have time to figure out whom you're going to spend forever with. Right now, just figure out how to afford rent and happy hour. Judging a Book By Its Cover The guy in the bar with the mullet and the avocado tattoo? Being Afraid Sitting back and hoping Ryan Gosling will walk into bar you're desperately hiding in? In the weeks leading up to my 30th birthday last summer, I found myself wishing for an "aha" moment to take hold.Nothing big, necessarily, just some assurance that as I embarked on a new decade, I had a clearer sense of who I was and what I was doing.




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